LEO
Mrs. O’Malley. I hope they took good care of you over at Saint Agatha’s.

MOTHER
They did.

BRENDA
How can you eat at a time like this?

COREY
I’m starving. I haven’t eaten all...

LEO
...Give him a minute, honey.

MOTHER
(Pause)
I’m wondering if there’s someone in this room who has something to say to me.
(Beat)
Corey Michael Aloysius O’Malley, don’t you have anything to say to me?
(Beat)
Look at my foot! Isn’t there something you want to say to me?

COREY
I’m only gonna say this once, Ma, so you’d better listen good. Number one, I’m sorry that I shot you in
the foot. And number two, I’m gonna marry Diana no matter what.

MOTHER
Well, I’ve done my best. The Good Lord knows I have. I thought I found a lovely girl for you...

COREY
(sees SARAH)
Ma, you don’t...

LEO
...This is the girl who...

SARAH
...Woman.

MOTHER
...but I made a mistake.

COREY
Finally, she admits it! Ma, you can’t...

MOTHER
...She’s Jewish.

COREY
So what? If she’s Lizzie’s friend, she’s welcome here.

SARAH
Thank you. And thanks for taking care of my car.

COREY
Hey, no problem. We’ll just bang out the dents and it’ll be as good as new.

MOTHER
Leo, you’re a lawyer, aren’t you?

LEO
Yes, I am.

MOTHER
Can you get married if you’re in jail?

LEO
Jail? Who said anything about jail?

VIVIAN
(pointing to MOTHER)
She did.

MOTHER
I always knew that’s where he’d end up. At Walpole State Prison.

COREY
Ma!

LEO
Mrs. O’Malley, I think you’re jumping the gun just a little here.

VIVIAN
That was kinda funny, Leo.

LEO
Huh?

VIVIAN
F... never mind.

LEO
What happened out there was an accident. Right, Corey? The gun went off accidentally.

COREY
No, it didn’t. I got her in the accelerator foot.

LEO
But you can’t say that.

COREY
Are you telling me to lie?

LEO
No, no. Of course not. But you don’t want to go to jail, do you? Mrs. O’Malley, you don’t want your
son to go to jail?
(Long pause.)
VIVIAN
She’s never been quiet for so f... long.

MOTHER
This is just like the Book of Job.

SARAH
Excuse me, does anyone know when Lizzie will be here?

COREY
Yeah, where is Lizzie?

VIVIAN
She went to the hospital to get Ma.

MOTHER
My Lizzie took the time to drive out and get me. –She was always my favorite.

VIVIAN
Hey, Ma, that’s not the story.

LEO
(to COREY)
We should talk about what happened out there and how you plan on defending yourself.

COREY
(stands)
Defending myself? I’m always defending myself! I can never do anything right around here, can I?


(DOORBELL RINGS. No one moves.)

COREY (cont’d)
I’m just like Dad, aren’t I? I’ll never amount to anything, will I? Well...

(DOORBELL RINGS again. No one moves.)

COREY (cont’d)
Well, I have amounted to something. I’m an auto mechanic. I own my own business. I got five guys
working for me. And I finally have someone in my life who loves me! ’Cause nobody around here ever
did!

VIVIAN
Oh, Corey.
(Goes to COREY and hugs him)
I fucking love you.